3 Words to Remove From Your Vocabulary

Words to remove from vocabulary

Last Updated on December 15, 2022 by Kayla

When it comes to language – or at least what comes out of my mouth – I can be as clumsy as I am on a pair of rollerblades. This isn’t a good thing. Just ask my husband or sister. They’ve seen the worst of me on wheels. 🤦‍♀️

from @_theblessedone on Instagram

This meme about sums me up. Sometimes I cringe when I watch Instagram stories of me talking. I often hesitate to share replays from live calls because my words just don’t seem to flow like they do in my head. When I am around people, I might say nothing to prevent the embarrassment of the half-thought that spills from my mouth.

This is why I enjoy writing. I can edit, CRTL+C ➡️ CRTL+V, and “delete” words that don’t seem to flow. I can reorganize thoughts rather than catch myself getting in my own head halfway through my point when I talk aloud.

And so, even though it’s uncomfortable, I post the post or share the video because if just one person can interpret and benefit from whatever gibberish I say, then it’s 100% worth it.

3 Words to Remove From Your Vocabulary

What I have learned on my personal quest to speak more clearly is that whether it’s what comes out of our mouths or the way we talk to ourselves, words are powerful. And, I would argue several words should be banned from our language – or at least held hostage for special circumstances {i.e. #3}. Below you’ll find three words to eliminate {or limit} from your vocab, and I promise you’ll be better for it! 🤓

1. “Should”

If you’ve joined any of the LIFe weekly live calls with Elizabeth and I, then you’ve probably heard us say, “Stop ‘shoulding’ yourself!” Get it? Like ‘sh*tting’ yourself! 😆

Anyways, the obligation that comes with the word “should” is daunting – ick! Either decide to do the thing or not. It’s that simple. Don’t say, “Well, I really should go for a walk.” This takes all the enjoyment out of it!

Rephrase this as, “I am going for a walk in 20 minutes when I finish my conference call” or “I will walk on the treadmill while I listen to my favorite podcast.” This allows you to embrace the reward from such things like moving your body and eating healthfully. Not rob you of the joy you deserve for taking care of yourself.

2. “But”

Nothing good ever comes after “but.” This three letter word steals any positivity from its predecessors. “I really want to go to your [insert MLM company here] party, but I have to XYZ.” Just say you can’t make it, it’s not your thing, or you have another obligation. Be honest and don’t tell little white lies. This way you – and everyone else you’re really with – don’t have to ghost your Facebook stories to hide what you really are doing instead.

Try replacing “but” with “and.”

For example, rather than saying, “I would love a nice dinner at Red Lobster, but I don’t want to wait an eternity for my food. Restaurants are so short-staffed!” ➡️ Try “I would love a night out at Red Lobster with you, and I am thankful for the staff that showed up today, so I could enjoy this meal. I will tip them extra good!”

See how simple that is! Exchanging “but” for “and” puts a positive spin on things and doesn’t drag down the conversation. While I mean this with a sprinkling of sarcasm, the truth is, it gets easier with time and patience.

3. “Sorry”

Oh man. Women are the worst when it comes to apologizing for every. little. thing! Literally, at a previous job, I nearly started a “sorry” jar – not a swear jar – because so many female colleagues were apologizing for everything!

Here are a couple examples to help remove the “S” word from your vernacular.

  • Oops – bumped into a stranger. “Sorry!” ➡️ Try “pardon me” instead. Side note: I always love when people say this. It sounds so darn polite – and classic! 😆
  • Shoot – grazed a colleague’s fingertips as they were reaching for the stapler at the same time. “Sorry!” ➡️ Instead, say, “You first” or “Dibs!” rather than exchanging the awkward and annoying, “No, you first.” “Oh no! You first! I insist.” Use the dang stapler and move along sister!

Notice how often you say “I’m sorry” throughout the day. Realize that everyone is busy {and distracted – mostly by their phones}. We all have sh*t to do, so stop apologizing for it!

The word “sorry” should be reserved for those noteworthy moments when you really f*ck up. “Sorry” shouldn’t be an afterthought or something that easily rolls off the tongue. It should make you squirm to say it.

Imagine losing your cool with a child, spouse, or co-worker. The time will come to buck up and apologize for screaming at your husband for leaving crumbs on the kitchen counter – again. Why does he always have to make a sandwich the second after I finish cleaning the kitchen?!

Anyways, saying you’re “sorry” should is meant for the moments you really mean it.

Progress Over Perfection

Soon enough, you’ll sound just like me! Talking half-thoughts out loud as you stumble to replace “should,” “but,” and “sorry” in your vocabulary. Reframing your language will get more comfortable with time. Focus on progress over perfection. This is an essential tactic I enforce throughout the LIFe program – progress, not perfection!

I have worked with hundreds of patients along the surgical pathway, and I understand that it’s a challenging road to navigate.

If you or someone you know would benefit from taking part in a special cohort of LIFe ladies status post sleeve gastrectomy, then message me to set up a free 15-minute consultation or join below.

Words from the Wise

“The worst speech you’ll ever give, will be far better than the one you never give.”

– Fred Miller

You have to start somewhere. This is where the “progress over perfection” thing comes in handy. The beginning of a journey is scary, but and starting is half the battle. My motto as of late has been, “Done is better than perfect.” Easier said than done for this type A control freak.

Perfect doesn’t exist, and sometimes the spontaneity of a misplaced word or awkward encounter will provide you with a long-standing story to tell or endless public humiliation which you’ll likely become stronger for. So, say the words {except the ones above!}, do the speech, and get your point out there. Chances are there is someone on the receiving end who will benefit.

Yours truly,

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